My mom always tells me...

So we see all our friends getting married around us; finding their "perfect matches" and multiplying and replenishing the earth with enthusiasm. And don't get me wrong; it's absolutely fantastic. But, for some reason, every guy I find that I think is semi-normal, semi-decent, and that I'm semi-attracted to ends up having some of the weirdest quirks I've ever encountered or....he's gay. I'm serious. Maybe not outright gay..but gay nonetheless.

Waiter... Can I get some love with that bread?

Well, lets get this blog going shall we. Ohhhh... dating, where to even start...OH let me tell you about one of my most recent experiences. And by recent, I really do mean recent, as in last weekend. So I have to apologize ahead of time that I am going to have to be very vague with details, but hopefully the story itself will still carry through with its gruesome hilarity. I would be mortified if either male counterpart found this story out, but I can't help but share it.

Sometimes I seriously wonder if God is up there masterminding my fate, and sees a possible situation arise in my future that he says to himself, "I think it would be quite hilarious to see how Hannah handles that situation. Lets make it happen." And thus ensues, my last date.

Now for the set up. It was a double date, Me and Boy A (I told you, vague details, sorry, not even fake names will do) and a married couple, who happened to be mutual friends of mine and Boy A's, they were the ones setting us up. A common occurrence seen in these latter days.

Boy A's stats:

- early 30's

- recently got kicked out of his single's ward

- loves hunting and football

- has his own house and a dog

3 out of 4 works enough for me (it was the hunting and football that are deterrents). On to the date...

So we met up at the married friends house, chit chatted a bit, then piled into Boy A's car to head on to dinner. Boy A asked me, "Do you know where we are going to eat?" Which I replied, "No I don't actually." He proceeded to make me guess as he told me certain defining qualities about the restaurant. His third clue was a dead ringer for a certain restaurant in town, and it sent me into panic mode. Because this certain restaurant has something quite unique about it, that NO other restaurants have in the area..... The guy I am secretly in love with works there.

Now let me set up Boy B. He is tall, dark and dreamy. Literally, most girls fall in love with him. I initially took the route of "Psht! He's overrated." But then we became friends (the killer of all romantic intentions) And I realized why all the girls fell in love with him. But I like to think I hide my crush rather well. Even though we flirt, its just friendly flirting and seeing as how we are extremely good friends and hang out all the time, somehow me liking him never comes up. Which it probably never will because, well, like I said, we are "friends" and I don't really think I am his type *sigh* as much as I would like to be. And I am a wimp. So I gave up on him long ago knowing it probably was never going to go anywhere and I am mostly happy just being his friend. Which is why I was trying to go on a real date with Boy A who was actually making an effort for me.

Alright on with the story.... So we arrived at the restaurant. I off-handedly mentioned that my friend worked there which spurred the poor married couple to say, "Well lets sit in his section, maybe he can hook us up with free drinks." I like to think I could have protested the idea and just said we sit somewhere else, buuuut I kinda wanted to see Boy B. And, just our luck, he was working that night. And maybe just a little part of me wanted Boy B to see me out with Boy A... but just a little, plus I was looking Go-oood that night, just sayin.

Next ensued the awkward exchanges, I introduced Boy A to Boy B and the married couple. He was professional and nice... and handsome. He sat down and talked to us for a bit. Another friend of mine that works there (also happens to be male, but married) came over and said hey, all the while Boy A is sitting there. At one point Boy A asked Boy B and I how we knew eachother, which I proceeded to stumble over because what am I supposed to say, "Well, I actually kinda have a thing for him, ya know, but we're friends so nothing will ever come of it." Ugh. Boy B left to put in our orders. Boy A turns to me and said, trying for the sympathy vote,"Man, I wish I could run into someone I knew." I just laughed, because thats what I do when I don't know what to say....

As the night went on, Boy A had his A-game on, he was trying, but I had radar on for Boy B and somehow just couldn't get into Boy A. I felt trapped in some twilight zone, or some funny joke, but I couldn't tell anyone. Oh, it was just awkward. Sometimes Boy B, (thinking he was funny I am sure) would stand in my line of vision and wait for me to look up at him, where he would be wearing some stupid look on his face. His intentions were to distract me from the date and he was doing a freaking good job of it. Boy A and the Couple fell in love with him as well because of his humor and his charming ways, and he indeed hooked them up with free drinks, which made their night. They even proceeded to say, "We should make this a thing every thursday night!" Noooo, lets don't.

Dinner ended and we proceeded to exit our booth, and the crazy person inside of me slipped out and said, "Let me go say bye to Boy B." I say it was out of just being polite, but really, who are we kidding? I tracked him down at the kitchen where I just waved over the partition, said thanks and bye thinking it would just be reciprocated, but no... He quickly dumped his dishes that had been piled in his arms into the sink and turned and said, "Wait, let me walk you out." "Um... I'm on a date! Quit trying to distract me!".....Is what I should have said, but I didn't. He claimed he had to tell me a story. So we met up with the rest of the crew and I said, "Hold on, sorry, he needs to tell me a story." They all nodded and shrugged, as if to say okay. So as Boy B told his story, all I could think of is, I am sure Boy A is watching me look at Boy B with googley eyes. So I tried my best to not look at him with googley eyes. Because even though Boy B may be blind to it, I am sure other people can see my body language.... ugh... stupid, stupid stupid!!

Boy B finished his story and we continued to say goodbye again, only to have him ask, "So, what are you guys doing after this?" I awkwardly shrugged and defaulted to Boy A and the Couple, to which they replied, "A movie or something." Who knows, I wasn't paying attention. All I could think of was, 'Could he possibly, maybe be jealous? Or is he just being a protective friend?' I don't want to even begin to think in that dangerous territory.

So we left and continued the date and it went okay, nothing incredible, but it was alright. After saying goodnight to Boy A, I checked my phone, only to see that I had a text message from Boy B joking about them leaving a crappy tip. At this point I gave in and we texted for the rest of the night. I'm weak, I know. And Boy B has yet to make any move to ask me out or anything (not that I am holding out hope that he will, I know he wont) Its just this is where I get caught every time, a decent guy who might actually like me and be good for me takes me out, but I get distracted by, and apparently only fall for, the stupid guys who have no clue what they want. I didn't give Boy A a fair chance, but I have a sneaking hunch that he wont ask me out again, seeing as how I flirted with another man on our date. (I'm an idiot, I know) Like I said earlier, I think sometimes God puts us in situations because he thinks its funny, and I didn't handle it well. :)